


Hide and Seek

by Cazio



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-21
Updated: 2014-05-21
Packaged: 2018-01-25 23:40:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1666739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cazio/pseuds/Cazio
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Loki’s gaze had grown so steady in the face of such anguish, Thor did not know. But they had changed to something Thor no longer recognized.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hide and Seek

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MartyMc](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MartyMc/gifts).



> This drabble was written as a gift for martymc, who wasn't feeling well when I wrote this some time ago.   
> It was inspired by a certain scene in Tangled.
> 
> Warning for angst and death.

The warm gold of Asgard seemed to be in a beautiful duet with the rich blue of the sky. There were no clouds, only birdsong and explosions of color in every crevice of green as flowers bloomed in the heat of summer. The sounds of children romping around in the gardens echoed all the way into the palace along with the faint sounds of pounding hooves as the palace horses chased the gentle wind that rolled through the pastures.

But Thor felt no heat, nor the caress of warm wind across his face. There was only darkness inside of his bedchamber and a distant look in his eyes so cold that the once-oceanic color therein now rivaled that of the deepest reaches of Jotunheim. His skin that used to be the color of honey was now flat and his proud frame had collapsed. His entire being was drained of life, as was evident by the way he stared down at the thin shaft of light that cut through the drapes in their bedchamber.

“You cannot sit in bed all day,” Loki murmured gently, coming around the side of their bed. Thor blinked, but did not respond. He had not spoken to anyone but his husband in months. It hurt too much to speak—if ever he made a noise that sounded like one he would have used with that baby…he could never forgive himself.

“Come now, my darling,” Loki soothed, tugging at Thor’s breast plate before beginning to fasten the buckles and straps. He noticed when Loki’s fingers hesitated for just the tiniest moment. A break in the façade Loki had built for him, Thor knew.

Thor slowly looked up at his husband with the frown that had replaced his once constant smile. No words needed to be said between them—they could both see the ragged pulp in each other’s chests where their heart—their joy, their life—had once been.

It had been a year since a guard ran to him in the gardens, shouting that he needed to go to the palace gates. It had been a year since he had raced through the halls and a year since he had stopped at the top of the palace stairs because he recognized the distant sound of Loki screaming with more emotion than Thor had ever heard before.

It had been a year since their son had ran out in front of a carriage after a toad.

Slender fingers nested into his hair as Loki cupped his face, tears shining in his eyes. “Up,” he whispered, and Thor immediately stood. When Loki’s gaze had grown so steady in the face of such anguish, Thor did not know. But they had changed to something Thor no longer recognized. There would forever be a rift between them now, because Loki knew who had suggested hide-and-seek that day, who had forgotten to tell him to be careful, who had—

Loki thumbed the tears that left his eyes as Thor sobbed quietly, turning his face into his husband’s palm. It was his fault. The one thing he had ever wanted to do was to make Loki happy. He had defied Aesir law and married him, he had let Loki risk his life and try for a child with spells of unknown magic, he had taken care of him until their son was born. They had raised him together for three years. Then Thor had trusted a three year old not to leave the garden during a stupid game of hide-and seek. He had murdered his child because of his foolishness, murdered his husband with the grief that had come from it, and now he was murdering their marriage because he was so weak.

“He is gone,” Loki said softly, sliding his hand to the back of Thor’s neck and pulling him close. “But I will never—never—blame you for that, no matter how much you want me to.” A noise of anguish escaped Thor’s lips and Loki nearly lost his balance when Thor leaned into him with so much weight. His arms moved around his husband’s broad shoulders, scratching lightly though he knew Thor could hardly feel it through all of the leather and metal. When he didn’t respond, Loki’s grip tightened around him until Loki was clinging more than he was embracing.

“I love you, Thor,” Loki breathed into his neck. “And he loved you more than anything. I cannot go out there alone. I need my husband. Asgard needs its king.”

Thor pulled back after a long moment and Loki wiped the tears from his puffy reddened eyes. “Promise me,” Thor croaked. “You will not leave me too.”

Loki tipped up his head and pressed a loving kiss to his husband’s lips. Thor knew he could taste the bitter grief in his mouth. Their fingers laced together and Loki gave his hand a firm squeeze.

“I promise.”


End file.
